home
by alpacaChristine
Summary: fic 3; "Sakura wants to be whole again. Not half of a confused girl and half of a broken man." sasusaku, collection of plotless drabbles
1. home

disclaimer: i ain't good enough to write naruto D:

notes;

-inspired by the quotes; 'home is where the heart is' & 'actions speak louder than words'

-word count: 329

-attempt to write in a new style

summary: for sakura, home would never be konoha no matter how hard she tried

* * *

'For Konoha,' she thought, as everyone discussed the future.

'for Sasuke,' _so he'd never become a monster like his brother- _she thought, when they mentioned him.

'for home.' she thought, as she resolved her plan.

"_Sakura," she heard her mother call,_

Sakura was proud to call Konoha home. She never regretted becoming a ninja, serving her life to the village. -_but her heart to another._

Every time Sakura thought of home, she remembered dusty mountains, especially the one with the carved face of her mentor. She thought of green trees scattered amongst creaky buildings, with brightly coloured roofs she sometimes leaped on. It was a place of war, but also was a place of happiness scattered in-between smiles and laughter and love. Home also had an important room she always barged into, many big training grounds she sweat on, and maybe also that small ramen stand where _they_ used to sit. But sometimes, Sakura likes to push the young children of the past to the back of her mind, ignoring the dull pain in her chest.

"_Whatever you do in the future, just remember-"_

And so Sakura thought of home. She thought desperately of home. From the moment's start, she told herself this mission was for home. _-but maybe her actions were just little a bit for Sasuke._

"_actions will always speak louder than words."_

Yet as she took the chance to stab the kunai into Sasukes back, her arm froze. Unable to move, unable to do it for 'home.' "Of course," she thought numbly, "What did I think, trying to convince myself? Home.. is where the heart is.". And unfortunately for the poor girl, her heart was already taken by the fool in front of her, ready to take away her life, ready to take away all her pain. And after all this time, Konoha was always just a mask for what she called 'home'.

* * *

i tried

note; for those who are reading this for my previous story 'I don't think this is normal', I am slowly trying to get back into writing but the plot for the story is messy and I'm still thinking on whether to try to salvage the idea and continue the story.


	2. to know sorrow

my measly contribution to ss month

disclaimer: if naruto was mine i could stop sasusaku to end the pain

-inspired by a poem about rangiku (if anyone wants to read it put it in a review and i'll link)

-word count: 309

summary: sakura had always thought too much, a bad habit she never got rid of

* * *

If more than anything, all Sakura wanted was another chance for them. Perhaps a world where nothing is so complicated, perhaps a world where love could conquer all.

But alas, life was not so. It was only so that it was Sakura who watched her beloved die, watched them breath their last death without knowing happiness, and fade to nothing. The future will not remember the hero of Uchiha, what he went through and what he had to sacrifice. They will continue life, taking everything for granted, while a piece of herself is lost forever to the forgotten boy.

Sometimes Sakura likes to tell herself it was for the best. That Sasuke is finally free, and is able to rest. But sometimes, in her lonely moments, she shamefully thinks otherwise. Sometimes she wishes she could've shown him all the colours of love, the same way he gave it to her. It was only a small selfish wish. Just one small wish.

Naruto, Kakashi... everyone has moved on. They know how to face reality, and Sakura is left to her whimsical dreams.

One night, before she surrenders to sinful dreams of a world where Sasuke exists, Sakura thinks to herself again - as if it was a mantra, what hurts her the most is not the sorrow that Sasuke is gone, but the endless possibilities of the happiness they could've had together.

_"Neh.. Sasuke-kun.." a quiet voice called._

_"..."_

_Continuing on as if he replied, "Do you ever think of the future?" the girl asked._

_"Hn." he replied vaguely. _

_"Well.. if you have no plans for it.. maybe someday I can show you the world like how I see it! "_

_Slightly amused and not impressed, all he did was nod. _

_"Don't worry Sasuke-kun! You'll understand someday. But for now, I pinky promise!" _

* * *

inspired by a bleach poem about rangiku, which i think portrays her feelings about ginran

yet i write about sasusaku? what shameful angst otp's you chose

i try


	3. whole

disclaimer: i don't own naruto, and thank god for that

notes;

-based off the word: whole & fake

-word count:

summary: Sakura wants to be whole half of a confused girl and half of a broken man.

* * *

Sakura wants to be whole again.

Not half of a confused girl and half of a broken man. She wants to feel whole and feel alive and feel happy when the wind brushes against her face. _Not_ the empty beating in her heart which is the only thing that keeps her _alive_. _(when really all she is is a broken china doll discarded on the floor)_

She wants to be someone who won't die nameless. After seventeen years, after her _whole life _living in shadows, she can no longer afford to be weak again. _(especially when her boys abandoned her and left her and forgot about her without a care) _

And so Sakura creates a mask.

She builds up walls around her heart, and shields herself from anymore pain. It's _simple_, faking a smile. After studying every single inch of the human body (_in desperate redemption)_, she knows human behavior just as well _(because she can't wear her heart on her sleeve anymore_).

Just a curve of a lip, and crinkle in your eyes and a lot of practice is all it needs.

_Oh_, but what about the eyes? What happened to the vivid green that slowly became darker and emptier as the years went by? You can't change that, _(you can't change that)_ and they will be able to tell.

_But they can't because nobody but fairy tale characters pays attention to the little things like that anymore._

No one can see through her fake smiles. _but Sai can. And he can tell that your smile is fake. He can tell that it breaks when Sasuke-kun is in front of you again. And isn't that ironic, because you were the one to teach him emotions when you yourself can't even-_

Sakura _will_ be whole once more.

* * *

i just like dark sakura

shamefully plotless


End file.
